asian:

asian:

so im shopping for make up for the girlfriend bc valentines day and holy fuck how do you girls afford this shit

$80 for eye shadow???

is it made out of unicorn shit

what is naked 3

why is it called naked

will it make her look naked

why is it $50

that’s 50 cheese burgers

i can’t deal with make up good bye

(Source: asian, via portkeytonarnia)

dyannehs:

dyannehs:

HOLY SHIT.  MY NEIGHBOUR IS SCREAMING AT HER BOYFRIEND.  Yeah, the two that keep me up at odd hours of the night. AND I’M ONLY PICKING UP BITS AND PIECES BECAUSE HE’S NOT SHOUTING BUT I’M FAIRLY POSITIVE HE JUST TOLD HER HE’S GAY AND THAT HE’S BEEN CHEATING ON HER WITH HIS BOYFRIEND.

UPDATE.  UPDATE.  HE’S CHEATING ON HER WITH HER BROTHER.

SON OF A BITCH IT’S LIKE A BAD SOAP OPERA EPISODE.

(via portkeytonarnia)

"You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that’s what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant… oh, fuck it." - The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014)

(Source: mashamorevna, via stainwashedskin)

Classmate: How can you celebrate Christmas if you don't believe in God?

Me: How can you celebrate Valentine's Day if no one likes you?